Mr. Rectangles

Long-time readers and twitter friends are well-acquainted with my obsession with man-buttocks (for example, see Mr. Beautiful Bottom).  So it was only a matter of time before I passed judgment on the D.C. derriere.

And that time has come.

The D.C. derriere?

Disappointing.

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I’m sure that there are some lovely bums in D.C.  But nobody ever gets to see them.

This is due to the fact that (hetero) suiting in our nation’s capital is, in a word, tragic.

Unlike the well-reared parisians to which I refer in my post on Mr. Sexy Suit, the men in D.C. hide their tushies away in a box.

Literally.

The suits here are cut like boxes, so that the men all walk around seemingly unaware that they are bedecked in rectangles.

After five years in Paris, it appears that I have started to embrace european sensibilities about menswear silhouettes.

Where are my delightfully cuppable globes of buttocks?  Nowhere to be seen.  I am drowning in a sea of ill-fitting trousers, badly cut jackets, voluminous and shapeless button-down tent-shirts, baggy jeans, and squashy looking coats.

Dapper fitted coats, where are you?  Trendy tweeds, slick slacks, and fetching footwear, why have you all forsaken me?

In what universe does “aesthetically conservative” mean “frumpy as all get-out”?  In the District of Columbia, ya’ll.  Right here.

Someone throw me a life-preserver!  Save me!  Save me from rectangular bums!

11 Comments

Filed under Misters

11 responses to “Mr. Rectangles

  1. Parisian

    You should move back to Paris for that!

  2. Sadly, my experience in D.C. leaves my impressions of women’s fashion in much the same category. The nation’s capital tends to be the capital of conservative fashion, from my perspective. Michelle Obama has her work cut out for her…

    • I agree. It’s like Ann Taylor separates vomited all over the city. It’s more than a little disappointing! They’ve learnt nothing from Jackie O, and Michelle Obama seems to be setting an example that nobody is following!

  3. Hence why I moved back to the UK! So I never have to see another pair of pleeted khakis *shudders*

  4. MM

    French men have absolutely beautiful butts…..I live two hours from Paris and dated a french guy for two years and I adored his butt…..sigh. Damn I still miss it. But the occasional sight of a lovely encased booty is not so far away.

  5. You know….
    With a little imagination, a lot of liquid courage, and a camera, I think we could turn this into a case study…..

  6. Pingback: Mr. Class Ring | Man-shopping in Paris

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s